Life has never been easy - and probably isn't for most of us. Why would I accept a life situation that can only create stress and disappointment? This could possibly be a universal question for a lot of people in this world. But, right now, it is my question to MYSELF. I had high hopes that this new relationship would be a HEALTHY relationship! I thought I was being cautious when this new chapter started in my life. But, it looks like I have only revisited some previous familiar issues that I thought I had learned lessons from. But wait, I have learned a lot and because of that I am able to move forward with strength and balance that I have not always had in the past. The realization that there are some issues that just can not be resolved to an acceptable level is a difficult position to be in. But, it looks like the time has come for me to wake up and and accept reality. During the past seven months I have had plenty of time to experience and assess the changes in my life as the result of having this man in my life. With the review of the pros and cons (written on paper) it is very clear to me what the best next step for me will be. I have been loving, patient, kind, supportive and understanding with this man. But, there comes a time when "band aid therapy" is not the answer and the GORILLA is still sitting in the room. And, the gorilla is as simple to see as this - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - > 
I can not say anything - to any of you that have experienced alcoholisn in the people close to you - that you don't already know. There is no point in giving specifics. The latest disturbing behavior from this man would not shock many of you. But, I thought it was "way over the top". I do not think very many families are totally void of addiction of one kind or another. My ex-husband was an alcoholic (died at age 47 of alcoholic toxicity) and my son is an alcoholic (not in recovery)!
I have strived and succeeded at living a fulfilling, happy and mentally healthy life with joy and friends and I do not choose to live my life with alcoholism in my home and life. With the support of friends and some new friends I know I will be just fine. The days ahead will be difficult but I will live one day at a time and with my glass "Half Full". If you believe in prayer, I would appreciate your prayers.
I do not know how much I will be posting in the near future but I know I will continue to enjoy your blogs. My hand/wrist continues to be a problem for me and I am scheduled for an EMG in the near future.
Blessings to All.
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